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"There are so many people getting married in Vegas, I kept seeing girls wearing dumb fake veils and stuff. I said to my girlfriends, "Thanks for not making me look like an idiot. Fast forward a few hours, and they had me blindfolded and handcuffed to a male blow-up doll, (which was anatomically correct, by the way), which my mother named Dick. They forced me to walk around the casino handcuffed to it for four hours, until Dick was apprehended by the casino police."

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